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Beckham going nowhere but a boulevard of broken dreams

It is a depressing image: the man who humiliated Hitler, sprinting against racehorses for a buck; Jesse Owens, the greatest athlete on earth, reduced to the cringing indignity of a freak show. He can i canada goose coat 1000 wash my canada goose coat used to lamely joke that the trick was to pick a nervous thoroughbred which wouldn’t take kindly to the starter’s gun. Maybe the laughter temporarily silenced that needling inner voice: “What the hell am I doing?”

Then there was Joe Louis, the Brown Bomber, bombed out and working as a meet-and-greet man for tourists at Caesars Palace. Once he had been untouchable. And Mike Tyson, who should have been Cast Iron Mike financially but saw $300m turn to dust. Now, facing drugs charges, he is doing exhibition bouts for his supper, while the punters of the Aladdin casino scoff theirs. Tyson has even toyed with entering the adult movie business but couldn’t quite swallow what pride he has left. Give it time.

Bathos is a great word but it means a descent from exalted to ordinary. It’s good buy canada goose jacket edmonton but it’s not right. Ordinary is too, well, ordinary. These are descents into a hell where we confront, for our sins, a nightmarish parody of our former selves. Up at the summit of Mount Olympus is Paul Gascoigne running Scotland ragged and, down in the Stygian depths, a 35-year-old wreck, out of breath and out of time in the Chinese second division. As the Liaoning Bodao player Luo Tongliang told the Beijing Star: “There seems to be a mismatch between his reputation and his actual performance.”

When Jack Nicklaus bade a final, tearful farewell to the Old Course, it was not a pitiful sight, though. It was moving, elevating and as inspiring as best ideas about canada goose outlet on pinterest any of his great victories there. I can see the Golden Bear, walking the 18th, acknowledging the tumultuous reception. He missed the cut and played like an amateur but that could canada goose coat $5000 no credit check signature loans not matter less. The moment is transcendent; an emotionally laden reminder of his greatness but never in the context of his decline. The best place buy canada goose jacket toronto stage is the thing and the word is dignity.

Back in 1991 I interviewed George Best. He told me he hadn’t had a drink for months and as the words emerged from his bearded face, fumes of stale booze shot out in hot pursuit. He spoke animatedly about his life and times. I felt so privileged and asked him what the greatest goal had been. My heart sank when he told me. “It was for San Jose Earthquakes against Fort Lauderdale.” The footage of his mazy run and cool finish still gets played.

“I still don’t know how I did it” goose, said Best. “You did it Georgie boy, because those defenders would be lucky to get a game in United’s reserves. Presuming Rotherham best canada goose jacket womens has a reserve team.” Did I say that? Did I hell.

Gazza echoed that well-practised self-delusion 15 years later: “I’m working well in China and scored a great goal.” George really believed it too.

He loved certain aspects of life in California – namely California girls. “It was a sexual paradise for any straight lad, not too ugly and with a British accent. The girls were uninhibited. They wrote their telephone numbers on scraps of paper and thrust them into my hand.” Well, it’s a good job David Beckham is happily married then.

I’ve got all the pre-programmed silicon chippiness of the next Jock, but when Beckham scored that free-kick against Greece, I leapt off the sofa and yelled at my England-shirted brother- in-law. “That is one of the greatest sporting moments we will ever see.” He was too intent on head-butting the ceiling. Why not a last hurrah at Villa or Spurs or Celtic or Newcastle and average price of canada goose jacket then, with a formidable head of public steam, an irresistible swansong with England? Instead, it’s Sunset Boulevard, LA Adidas and tedious tussles against Mo Johnston’s Toronto FC, Stevie Nicol’s New England Revolution, the Detroit Spinners and the Wichita Linemen. Sprinting against donkeys.

It’s a knacker’s yard for knackers and nobodies and, however you furnish it, whatever top-of-the-range cars grace its driveway and whatever designer clothes hang in its walk-in closets, that is all it is. Money beyond the California dreams of avarice? How could that be hell? Such a lovely place. Such a lovely face.

I don’t predict a riot at the Home Depot Centre, just well-supervised craziness

At the 2002 World Cup the organisers recruited and corralled thousands of Japanese and Korean locals to become ersatz fans of various teams for the duration of matches. Hence you would get a bigger than expected attendance and lots of partisan cheering. It was disconcerting. There was something chillingly artificial about it. At a Brazil v Turkey game I watched a bunch of “Turkey” fans go ludicrously OTT whenever they won a throw-in and then at the end walk from the ground like “Stepford” supporters, laughing and cheering and happy as pigs in muck, even though their team had been tonked. bright blue canada goose jacket I came across something else this week that made me nostalgic for the Chelsea Headhunters.

In the fans’ zone on the LA Galaxy website, the hardcore supporters groups promote themselves. These are fans who are, I suspect, disinclined to engage in a spirited chorus of “You’re shit and you know you are”. LA Riot Squad claim to be “a multi-ethnic group of soccer fanatics”. Their sole mission is to make the atmosphere at LA Galaxy games “a bit more festive and intense”.

“Standing in Section 138, the Squad sings, chants, and yells in support for the Galaxy while giving the team a distinct home advantage. There are no fees, dues, or inhibitions. Join us today by asking to ‘Stand with the Riot Squad!’” Frankly, I’d rather sit through the Vagina Monologues.

We also have the The UFOs: “a group of enthusiastic soccer fans from the South Bay area of Los Angeles that have made a commitment to the game of soccer and the Los Angles Galaxy team. In the inaugural year at the new Home Depot Center, the UFO group has 205 season tickets in Section 133.” Hey, see you there guys. One of these crazy fan groups has the motto Veni, Imbibi, Vici – I came, I drank, I conquered. Clearly you don’t have to be mad to stand in Section 133 (East side, just south of the center line) but it helps.

Current crop of Chelsea Pensioners take the biscuit

Remembering my days in local radio, (and inevitably what goes around comes around), I still agonise at that difficult second line in the match report. It is like the difficult second album. How not to repeat yourself? How to avoid repetition? Answer: resort to nickname. For example, “Wycombe rocked football to its very foundations last night. The Chairboys put six glorious goals past Jose Mourinho’s beleaguered Chelsea etc etc.” We can but dream.

Chairboys is a great one as it refers to the town’s one-time renown as a furniture-making centre. I love the sense of community and tradition the name conveys. It tells a social history, harking back to an age when football clubs represented communities and communities were sustained by local manufacturing. Sadly, some such become obsolete. Reading canada goose coat 1000 calorie meal plans were originally known as the Biscuitmen after one of the main factories in the town, Huntley

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